For the most part I wear makeup everyday. I wear it because I'm a girly girl. It makes me feel sexy and it's something that I'm really passionate about. However, I don't feel as though I need the makeup to look beautiful. Not at all, I feel beautiful without it. So sometimes I just don't wear any.
Well a few weeks ago I went to a kid's birthday party, and I decided not to wear any makeup. After all it was at the park and I didn't think all the glam would be necessary.
No big deal, until my friend says...
"You look like you don't feel too good, and you look tired." Whoa! That was a slap to face, especially considering I felt fine, I wasn't tired and I was enjoying myself. At this point I had two options. I could either tell her I feel fine and that the reason why I look different is because I'm not wearing makeup (which is the truth, but might make her feel bad) Or I can lie and say I don't feel all that well. (which after her comment, isn't so much of a lie anymore) So thats exactly what I did, I lied. I said I didn't feel well and then I left.
Honestly, I was hurt by what my friend said, I thought that was so rude, but I also felt sympathy for her. I didn't want to make her feel bad for her ignorance. Later I found myself crying about it & I felt silly. Why did that hurt my feelings? She was obviously not trying to hurt me, she just doesn't know any better. She doesn't understand that what she said had hurt my feelings. I sat for a while and thought...Is that what people think when they see me without makeup? That I look sick and tired? Which is a terrible thought, because I am neither of those. I am healthy, happy and full of life. Then I looked in the mirror and saw a beautiful face, a beautiful smile and a beautiful soul. So why should someone's stupid remark make me feel insecure?
Honestly, I was hurt by what my friend said, I thought that was so rude, but I also felt sympathy for her. I didn't want to make her feel bad for her ignorance. Later I found myself crying about it & I felt silly. Why did that hurt my feelings? She was obviously not trying to hurt me, she just doesn't know any better. She doesn't understand that what she said had hurt my feelings. I sat for a while and thought...Is that what people think when they see me without makeup? That I look sick and tired? Which is a terrible thought, because I am neither of those. I am healthy, happy and full of life. Then I looked in the mirror and saw a beautiful face, a beautiful smile and a beautiful soul. So why should someone's stupid remark make me feel insecure?
My beauty shines through whether I'm all glammed up or going all natural. So that brings me to the next question... Why did that shake me up so badly? I think its because up until three years ago, I didn't really wear makeup, ever. People used to see my face every day and no one ever said anything negative about it. No one ever said I look tired, no one ever said I looked sick. However, now everyone is used to seeing me all dolled up, so when I'm not, they instantly think something is wrong.
To me it's so obvious that you should never comment on a woman's looks, unless you are doing so in a positive way. You don't comment on her weight, her looks, or her age. Those are just things you don't do and I thought that was understood by everyone, but apparently not.
So for those of you out there who are thinking about commenting on a woman's look in a negative way, think twice.
So for those of you out there who are thinking about commenting on a woman's look in a negative way, think twice.
1. You come off as rude or uneducated.
2. You might hurt their feelings and make them doubt their self.
Just put yourself in their position, if someone were saying that to you would it make you feel good? If the answer is yes, then say it... if not then hold your tongue.
Just put yourself in their position, if someone were saying that to you would it make you feel good? If the answer is yes, then say it... if not then hold your tongue.
If you are a woman and someone has made comment like this to you, don't take it personally. Just know that no matter what anyone says, YOU ARE BEAUTIFUL. Just the way you are. Without makeup (gasp) without any of the glam (double gasp). Please believe that. This is coming from the mouth (or fingertips) of a diva. I am all about the glam and looking fabulous but I also love natural beauty, there's nothing sweeter than a fresh face and messy hair.
Peace&Love
Shelly xo
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